Honestly I just broke down in tears and cried the hardest I have done in a while. Now I'm currently blasting "Sorry" because its such a personal song to me. I have no idea where to put myself right now, and this is going to seem really rushed and no where near in detail but I feel like I need to get something down. I'm breaking down from the inside out. Tearing myself up. I hate myself for sinking so deep. Allowing myself to fall. I hate myself for allowing everything about me break. I changed my outlook on boys because of you and its the most rewarding thing I have ever done, but right now I'm regretting it cause I am severely hurting.
I want to open up your eyes and show you a whole other world. A world I know you would be comfortable in. A world that I would make you comfortable in. I've got this pit, gut, nervous feeling hanging in my stomach now. I really need you to be here, and just hold me. That's it. That's all I will ever need. I feel like nothing will ever make this feeling go away. I could write a thousand songs or more and nothing will ever be able to take the feeling away. The pain. The love. The hurt. The happiness.
I hate being in two minds over everything. I hate no knowing. I just need you to wake up, sooner rather than later. Everything needs to fall in place cause I feel like I'm depending on it. I know its fear of rejection that holds me back, but if I am rejected, knocked back, then I know I would definitely die inside.
Just so you know, I'm thinking about you today...
Honestly right now I am the happiest I have ever been. Tomorrow is a fantastic day in my eyes every single year. The person I think a lot about is completely happy. He's just the one I fell in love with. The boy who just caught my attention and I've hung in knowing that deep down somewhere under his guard 'he' is still there and today I saw 'him' again. I will never ever feel this way about anyone else ever. Unconditional love. Forever and ever.
Thank you God for bringing him back to me, even though I know he never actually left.
- A girl with a healed heart
Thank you God for bringing him back to me, even though I know he never actually left.
- A girl with a healed heart
NEW YORK CITY
TIMES SQUARE
MIDNIGHT
A LITTLE BIT LONGER
3 BROTHERS
20,000+ PEOPLE
TIMES SQUARE BEING BOUGHT TO A STANDSTILL
BURNING UP TOUR
MADISON SQUARE GARDEN
SORRY - JONAS BROTHERS
THE ONLY ENGLISH GIRL IN THE CROWD OF PEOPLE, MY ACCENT ATTRACTING SO MANY FANS...HAHAHA
FINALLY GETTING INTO THE STORE AND BUYING THE CD
FEELING THE HAPPIEST I'VE EVER FELT
SO MANY MEMORIES
ONE YEAR LATER AND I STILL LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, LIKE I DID BACK THEN, IF NOT STRONGER. YOU HAVE MY HEART. ALWAYS HAVE, ALWAYS WILL.
<3
TIMES SQUARE
MIDNIGHT
A LITTLE BIT LONGER
3 BROTHERS
20,000+ PEOPLE
TIMES SQUARE BEING BOUGHT TO A STANDSTILL
BURNING UP TOUR
MADISON SQUARE GARDEN
SORRY - JONAS BROTHERS
THE ONLY ENGLISH GIRL IN THE CROWD OF PEOPLE, MY ACCENT ATTRACTING SO MANY FANS...HAHAHA
FINALLY GETTING INTO THE STORE AND BUYING THE CD
FEELING THE HAPPIEST I'VE EVER FELT
SO MANY MEMORIES
ONE YEAR LATER AND I STILL LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART, LIKE I DID BACK THEN, IF NOT STRONGER. YOU HAVE MY HEART. ALWAYS HAVE, ALWAYS WILL.
<3
I'm scared that my dad is right, but that is not a bad thing.
In fact it couldn't be any further from being a bad thing. it would be a fantastic thing. the only bad thing is the whole being scared of the the 'thing' that is going to make me the happiest I've been ever.
I don't know.....
True, it may seem like a stretch
But its thoughts like this that catch
My troubled head when you’re away
When I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home
In fact it couldn't be any further from being a bad thing. it would be a fantastic thing. the only bad thing is the whole being scared of the the 'thing' that is going to make me the happiest I've been ever.
I don't know.....
True, it may seem like a stretch
But its thoughts like this that catch
My troubled head when you’re away
When I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road
For several weeks of shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home
I maybe over-reacting or whatever, but you are not doing this to me. I am not going to let you. I am sick to death of you going to anything with a pulse for a rebound. You need to take control of your life. Sure I maybe reading into something way too much but its a joke. For the past week I have been the happiest I have been for a while and I feel like that because I haven't had any drama from you. My life was simple and just fun and here you go again putting a downer on everything.
Maybe its just better for me to take you out of my life completely because you always some how make me depressed. I can't be dealing with this. I want to be happy and as much as I love you, you are really making me angry of late. It hurts me so much to say that but its true. I don't want to be made sad by the person I love the most but that is what is happening.
I need a break from you. You and your stupid insecurities that you need to deal with without going to the nearest rebound. You need to deal with your own issues mentally and not be scared of being alone. Its ridiculous.
For now, I can't be dealing with anything like this. I need to drown myself in things that make me happy and it makes me sad to say that you seem to no longer be one of those things. I will always love you without a doubt. Right now I need to deal with some things, and you can't be a part of it.
<3
Maybe its just better for me to take you out of my life completely because you always some how make me depressed. I can't be dealing with this. I want to be happy and as much as I love you, you are really making me angry of late. It hurts me so much to say that but its true. I don't want to be made sad by the person I love the most but that is what is happening.
I need a break from you. You and your stupid insecurities that you need to deal with without going to the nearest rebound. You need to deal with your own issues mentally and not be scared of being alone. Its ridiculous.
For now, I can't be dealing with anything like this. I need to drown myself in things that make me happy and it makes me sad to say that you seem to no longer be one of those things. I will always love you without a doubt. Right now I need to deal with some things, and you can't be a part of it.
<3
I can't believe how fast this year has gone. Its literally just flown by. Honestly I can't believe I'm legal in like 3 months time. Not that its going to really change anything in my life. I don't like drinking so that isn't going to be added in my daily lifestyle or anything. Its just going to mean being an adult now. Kinda hard to...like take in. However its going to mean I can go to see people like Fightstar now, considering they only do 18 and over gigs. hahaha!
ANDDDD meaning me and my bestie can hit up lots of festivals and go on holiday together without really having to ask our parents (other than the fact we will need to "loan" money from them to pay for it).
Random.....oh and on a brighter note my life and myself are really happy lately..... :D
ANDDDD meaning me and my bestie can hit up lots of festivals and go on holiday together without really having to ask our parents (other than the fact we will need to "loan" money from them to pay for it).
Random.....oh and on a brighter note my life and myself are really happy lately..... :D
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